Respect My Right NOT To Choose

I would like to start by saying that some of my closest friends are lesbian women. We share everything together. We share laughs, and have even cried together. I have given advice on relationships and everything. I say that because a lot of people feel as though if a person does not agree with something they hate it. I have never understood why voicing your personal views on the homosexual culture could conjure up such hatred. It would be easy to say that I don't accept something because I don't understand it, but I stand here saying that I fully understand the gay culture and way of life, but that still does not mean I agree with the lifestyle. And just because I do not agree with the lifestyle does not mean that I hate gays people.

I am close friends with people who smoke marijuana, does that mean I have to go out there and smoke it? No. Does that mean I have to let someone who is smoking a joint come around my children while they are smoking? Absolutely not. As a human being I have the right as well as the final say so on what I want to expose my children to, especially while they are ages six and four. The two little ones in my life have come around my lesbian friends. They have also played with them and they even call them auntie, but what I will not allow is for them to engage in public displays of affection around them. Does that make me anti-gay? I would think not. I say I am giving my children the right to choose for themselves. I will raise them the way my parents and my pastor has taught me, without going all religious with it, I want to instill in them that it is common for a man and a woman to be together. What I will not do is go around and force them to hate gay people. I want them to love everybody for who they are, but I do not feel as though I have to throw the subject of homosexuality on them when they are trying to discover who they are.

The males in my family I will present women to them for them to potentially engage in relationships with when they get old enough. The same thing goes for the little females. I will try to promote my little girls to go after eligible men. Now if I find out that they want something different, I have no choice but to accept their differences, but by all means that does not make me a bad person just because I would rather my child not grow up gay. I don't go around saying "don't do this or that because it's gay" or saying things that go against gay people. I just want to protect my children as long as I could and give them a fair chance to make up their own minds on what their sexual preference. I understand that gays and lesbians are all around me, and I love them, but I choose a different lifestyle for myself as well as the lives of my children. It's a free country and people have the right to choose. I choose not to live the gay lifestyle what harm is there in that?

I honestly believe that people who wish to jump all over me all because I openly disagree with the gay lifestyle needs to take a chill pill and take a deeper look in themselves. I have never been a yes woman, and I do believe that I am entitled to my own opinions and beliefs. I guess some people are more mature than others. I have no problem with having healthy adult relationships with homo and heterosexual adults. They clearly understand that I do not want that lifestyle for myself and they respect that. It's one thing if I walk around talking hate against gays--which I don't, but to disagree with the lifestyle does not mean I hate the people that engage in the activity. And if you are going to ridicule me all because I don't agree with your way of life, then I say go take a hike and jump off of a cliff you idiot.

Ethnic Notions

"Since the days of slavery, skin color has been used as a tool of separation and preferential treatment within the black community. The residue of the "house" versus "field Negro" divide has long remained with us, even as we celebrated black pride in the '70s and hip-hop culture in the '80s. House slaves were usually products of a relationship between a master and a female slave, so they tended to have lighter skin. The boss's offspring would more than likely receive the special favor of doing work inside the house out of the hot sun. They'd eat better, often get taught to read and write, and enjoyed many of the liberties of non-slaves. Slaves with darker skin were usually stuck toiling in the fields. The anger over that old distinction has never quite gone away in African-American culture."  -Allison Samuels

Being a light-skinned black woman, I have had to often times feel guilty about my skin complexion. The divide is so great that often times I can't take a compliment in the presence of some darker skinned women without feeling guilty of something. I'm a woman who believes that black is beautiful, all shades of it, but I constantly hear people tell me that I'm not as stuck up as I looked or that they thought because I was light skinned, that I thought I was "all of that". On too many occasions I wished that I was a mocha or buttery smooth almond complexion so that I could be proud of being complimented without the fear of having to offend someone else.

With slavery ending over 400 years ago, one would think that people would do away with the stigmas associated with the varying degrees of black, however the discrimination is still prevalent. I blame it more on the ignorance of the very culture that I embrace and was born into--the black culture. Yea I agree that the white man may have started it on a slave farm way back yonder, but I can no longer continue to thrust the blame on Caucasian Americans when I see darker skinned women before my very eyes become role models and celebrities. I believe people on the lower level of the totem pole are still holding on to this notion as sort of a basis to continue the vicious cycle among smaller communities and cultures. For example, When I look at entertainers today I see Jennifer Hudson, "Precious", Oprah Winfrey, Gabrielle Union, Tichina Arnold and a whole slew of very dark skinned women and men in the industry and plastered all over the media. I believe that as a culture we are gravitating more and more towards the acceptance of all skin tones. Is it over with? I don't believe so, because more and more people in my neighborhood still feel a certain way about a light skinned woman being successful.

The video, Ethnic Notions, gives us a glimpse into the way society viewed the black race back in the days. They portrayed the black person as the "Mammy" the "Uncle" the "Black Sambo" etc. in the decades after slavery. That's because people were not as educated in this issues of equality. However, I feel that this great country that we live in are slowly gravitating towards letting in all shades of black. If you take a look at the Aunt Jemima logo from back in the days and the one now, you will see that they have made even that dark skinned logo more attractive. If you don't believe me, have a look for yourself.

Biracial Who? Not My President.

 

Biracial: of, relating to, or involving members of two races 
This is the term that could identify America's current President, Barack Hussein Obama, but his daughters Malia and Sasha are most definitely black. It's apparent when you watch those gorgeous little girls on television smile at us showing off their glowing, black and beautiful skin. Black however is not just skin deep. The one-drop rule is a historical term in the United States used for the social classification as Negro to all or any individual with any African ancestry; meaning any person with "one drop of Negro blood" was considered black. Therefore if black is strong enough to cloud the blood of a person born with both a white and a black parent, then why would this same rule not apply to the President's daughters who are born to a black mother and a--well BLACK father. It is in my opinion that anyone who would deem these two young ladies as anything other than black--especially biracial are trying to strip them of the very heritage that have embraced and accepted them from the beginning.

A person may argue that the one-drop rule is outdated and sort of shunned now by society. I would still say that this supports the claims that the president's daughters are black and black alone. Tiger woods who was considered half black and half white. When asked openly what race he identified with, he said that he considered himself as a white man. To identify himself as such is a choice all his own. Tiger dates women in the White race and has two sweet little babies from his now ex wife who is also a white woman. If asked what Tiger's children are, I would say that his children are white. Their parents are not of two races. Tiger is white and their mother is also white. Obama, as a matter of fact has identified himself as a black man. Much of society has also identified him as a black man. "Barack Obama, the first African American President." If Barack Obama identifies himself as a black man and Michelle Obama who has a black mother and a black father is his wife and the father of his children then why would their spawns not be black?

Race is such a big thing in the media these days. Lots of times the media seems to be concerned with what a person's DNA make up is, instead of connecting with the person. It's like they have to make a big announcement first of the person's genetic make-up before accepting or shunning them. I don't feel as race should be that important in the media, but if you are going to classify someone in a race category, it would be wise to get it right. 

 The author of the article Dear Confused White People... found on this link: http://www.jackandjillpolitics.com/2009/01/dear-confused-white-people-malia-and-sasha-obama-are-not-bi-racial/ raises valid points. Just because Barack Obama is the President of the United States does not mean that you have to strip him of his blackness in order to identify with him. He is a black man. He says so himself and people need to just respect this fact in the same regard as they accept Tiger Woods and address this man the way he has declared. I read a quote somewhere that you are who you answer to. Barack Obama answers to being called a black man. his children are a product of himself, therefore the entire first family is black. Hate it or love it, but respect it.